I used to say, "If you've come looking for angst-you've just won the lottery, because my diary is full of it." But I hope you don't find that. I hope you find hope, a light in the darkness.

Allow me to introduce myself.

My name is Teresa. I used to say that "I'm just your average, run-of-the-mill teenage girl." But what is the average girl? Let's take a moment to define her, and see how I meet the requirements: Not too girly-girl (I don't wear that much makeup, and I'm not afraid of bugs), not a complete tomboy. I'm not afraid to get my hands dirty if a job needs it (what can I say? I used to work at Buger King), but I do draw the line at a certain point. Blood grosses me out. So, yes, I guess you could say in some ways that I am simply average. But there are some things you should know about me.

What you should know is that I am a follower of Christ. I love my Lord and Savior more than life itself. If "religious" diaries offend you, then... well, you probably shouldn't read this. But I love you anyway, and I invite you to pull up a chair, grab a cup of coffee, and stay a while.

I used to say, "My diary may contain all of my angst and complaints, but my life is not bad. I just go through rough spots." That is still true. However, that has changed so much... I don't have much angst or complaints right now. I still struggle sometimes, and I always will. But I have hope that helps me overcome my struggles.

I used to say, "I still struggle with being confident-in myself and in others. Though people argue, I don't find myself very pretty at times. Sometimes I look good, and I know it, but other times I cut myself down a lot. And with being confident and trusting others, a few relationships have left a bad taste in my mouth. It breaks your trust after a while." But now, it really doesn't affect me. I know I'm beautiful because I was made that way. I don't have to be confident in myself. I'm so dumb and I just mess things up. But I am confident in the One who gives me confidence in Him.

I used to say, "I'm very naive. I have big dreams. I need to be loved. I thrive off of being loved." That's still true.

I've never done drugs, had sex, been kissed (besides on the cheek), kissed anyone (besides on the cheek), tried to commit suicide (though I have thought about it), been to Europe (I plan on it someday) or Kansas or New York...

I LOVE music. Music makes me happy. Music has the power to influence so many people.

I like food. I like my bagels to be toasted and loaded up with butter and cream cheese. I like my pizza with cheese--lots and lots of cheese--and cheese only. I love fruit juice, especially white grape peach. I love fruit for that matter. It's so good tasting and good for you. I like potato products, so much so that it surprises me I'm not fat. I'm lucky that I'm active and drink water. I love Italian food. Anything Italien--fetuccini alfredo (with chicken kiev, but I don't think that's Italien), lasagna, spaghetti. I also like helo bread (spelling?), but that's Greek. I like my apple pie warm with vanilla ice cream on the side. I like my Subway sandwiches with turkey, the white cheese, lettuce, tomato, pickle, mayonnaise, and mustard on white bread.

Icthus9000... someone asked me what this means. Allow me to explain. I needed a new screen name for myself. "icthus," or correctly spelled "ichthus" (a small mistake on my part) is the Christian fish. You might see it on the back of a car. I have one on mine. And the 9000--well, when creating this screen name, I needed something unique. My brother is quite creative, so I asked him. "2433, or 9000," he said. 9000 is easier to remember. Plus, it sounds kooky, like a weird product. "You cannot live without trying our new product--the 'Pancake Flipper 3000,' a combination whisk and pancake flipper all in one!" It's nifty, I guess.

For the technical side of me, I am a freshman at Indiana State University as a Choral/General Music Education major. I actively participate in campus ministries like InterVarsity, Vision, and freshmen girls Bible study. I also go to Maryland Community Church here in Terre Haute on Sunday mornings and evenings. I am also, being a music major, in two choirs--Concert Choir and Women's Chorale. I'm in applied voice lessons.

So what are my future ambitions? Well, for now, I'm just taking it one day at a time. I'm here, today and now for a specific reason. And if I'm somewhere else down the road, I'm fine with that. I don't generally worry too much about my future. Some will mistake that with not being prepared or lazy, but on the contrary, my friends... I know who holds my future. But that's another story.

Anyway, I know that I've been called to lead worship and I'm being led into the ministry. Where that is or what I'll be doing specifically is unknown to me, but then I will refer you to the above paragraph. I love kids, and I love youth--particularly middle school-aged kids. There's so much drama there, but if I can help in any way, I will. So teaching music would be really cool, too.

I used to say, "Yup. Just your average girl. Or am I? You decide." But... I don't want to be the average girl anymore. So, it's cool if you think I'm average, but I like to think of myself as set apart, one chosen out of many.